Sunday, September 26, 2004

Abused women and Victim Behavior

A quote from an article on Domestic Violence: Understanding Victim Behavior

This is often followed by a period in which the
abuser realizes that he has lost control. He becomes
apologetic and loving. The victim begins to see the man
that she cared for to begin with. Women who are victims of
domestic violence do not want to give up on their partner
or their relationship anymore than anyone
else.


I want to add that the abusee gets power over the abuser
after she gets beat up.

This is known as the 'honeymoon' period.

The woman is now the manipulator and does not want to give
that up.

The dynamics of abuse and victim behavior are
complex. It is extremely difficult for a victim caught in
an abusive relationship to make the decision, and take the
necessary steps, to leave an abusive relationship. Abusers
are often very controlling and possessive. They often move
the family away from the victim's family and friends. This
removes the victim's support system and makes it difficult
for her to leave because she has fewer places to go to for
assistance


Fixing your personal boundaries means giving up on the
desire (unconscious or otherwise) to be a manipulator. It
also moves you away from being manipulated.

Unfortunately, people with bad boundaries don't like people
with healthy boundaries.

In order to want healthy boundaries ( I mean get your
uncoscious to go along with this new position) one has to
have self worth.

My ebook describes the differences between self esteem and
self worth


http://www.software4yourmind.com/selfesteem/

more soon

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